In Your Corner Coaching & Consulting Services

The answer, as usual, is “It depends.” For some of us, we are always on the move, always jumping to the next thing, perhaps overly influenced by the compelling nature of our obligations or interests. In that case, it can be good to interrupt the flow with some time to assess whether we’re actually on track toward goals worth meeting.

Others of us have less of an action-orientation. We gather information, think things through, strategize and plan with great skill, but choosing among options and moving into decisive action can be more of a challenge.

I often fall into the second category. I enjoy exploring possibilities and tweaking plans, looking for the best option. When it’s time to move from analysis to action, I can find it hard to make the transition. At that moment, momentum can be a valuable gift. I’ve learned that when I experience energy and enthusiasm towards something that needs to be done, it’s best to consciously lean into it and let it carry me along.

Here’s an example: At the time I started graduate school, I had three children around middle-school age. The increased complexity of my life, with classes, homework and project teams added to school carpooling, soccer games and Boy Scouts, seriously challenged my ability to manage my time reliably. I decided I needed to find the right tool on the first try - I didn’t have the luxury of cobbling something together that “might” work, or I could end up forgetting to pick up my son at dusk in the middle of Ypsilanti.

So, one day, I made a pilgrimage to the not-so-local Franklin Quest store. I kited myself out with a leather binder, a year’s worth of attractive daily planning pages, and all the trimmings I thought I would need. I also signed up then and there for “Franklin Planner training” for the next day. Within half a week, I had imported all the important information about my life into the planner and was ready to use it in a robust way, a development for which I thanked God regularly throughout the rest of my educational career.

I used my enthusiasm for “cool tools” and the energy of momentum to accomplish in several days what might have taken months if I’d adopted an incremental approach.

So know yourself. What kind of person are you? What motivates you to take a right action? If momentum serves you, stir it up and use it.

If you’re like me, waiting at the luggage carousel brings on a feeling of foreboding. Person after person hauls up her suitcase and trolleys off to the door while I wait anxiously for my bag to come thumping down the ramp.

These luggage tags have just made it onto my “must-have” list. There’s a pocket to insert your travel itinerary; printed instructions in 8 languages tell the finder of your wandering luggage to send them on to meet you at your next generation.

I that that if I don’t get these, the next time I change planes I’ll wish I had.

One of life’s big challenges is focusing your energy without letting anything important fall through the cracks. Here are some helpful tips to help you stay out of the sand traps of life:

Write things down.

Unless you’re among the 2% or so of people who can carry every detail in their heads without fail, develop a simple system to capture the date of your next committee meeting, the mechanic’s estimate for your engine rebuild, or nifty tool your brother-in-law can’t live without. Take a look at our Tips and Tools page for some handy ways to keep track of details.

Turn off the radio.

After you check the traffic and weather, snap off the radio for the rest of your drive to work. Think about the day ahead. Call to mind the things that are important — both tasks that need to be accomplished and the kind of person you want to be during your day. Have you read or heard something lately that inspired you? Call it to mind. Do you have a particularly sticky problem on the horizon? This can be a good time to sit with it and let your mind be creative.

Know Your Style

Do you like silent seclusion in order to focus? Or do you do your best work collaboratively? Be proactive about providing yourself the kind of environment that helps you function at a high level. Is your work environment the exact opposite of what you need? Be creative. Look for ways to carve yourself a niche, or keep an eye out for other similarly collaborative folks and find a conference room with a whiteboard for brainstorming.

Know Your Strengths

According to research by the Gallup Organization, one of the elements of engaging and effective work is doing what you do best every day. But many of us don’t have a clear idea of what our strengths are. A good starting point is the Signature Strengths inventory available at AuthenticHappiness.com (free registration required).

Use Your Strengths

Once you are aware of your innate strengths (not, by the way, to be confused with training or skills), you need to employ them. Sometimes, though, it’s not clear how our strengths can be applied to the challenges we face. For instance, perhaps Rebecca, a rather shy software developer, is called upon to make connections with other key departments and persuade them to share information vital to completing an important project. How can she use her tendencies to be detail-oriented and methodical to good advantage?

A naturally reserved person is often uncomfortable in interactions that have to be improvised on the fly. So Rebecca’s strengths can be called upon in her preparation. Her analytical talent-set will come in handy to develop reasons that an ongoing collaboration might be beneficial to the other departments. Development of a clear explanation of the value of the project to the entire organization, a precise description of what is required, and anticipation of possible objections will increase the likelihood of a prompt and positive response.

You may want to look at the “What is Coaching?” page for an overview of what coaching is and when it can be beneficial. Here, we’ll be talking about what it’s like to be in a coaching relationship.

• It is a relationship. Fit between the two of you is important. Have an exploratory conversation with the coach. Ask about their approach to coaching. Get a feel for him or her - are you comfortable with his communication style? Is he relatively free of assumptions about clients and workable solutions? Is his value set congruent with yours? Is he someone you’d look forward to talking to?
• Be clear about what you are sure you want, but be open to looking at your assumptions in a new way. Let your coach know about the important issues that bring you to coaching. Is it a one-time situation, such as a career transition, an unexpectedly poor performance review, or a new challenge for which you feel ill-equipped? Or is it an ongoing problem: procrastination, impatience with subordinates, needing to improve relationships with people in your managerial chain?
• Be ready to describe what you know about yourself It’s helpful to tell your coach what you’re aware of about your interpersonal style, the areas where you are strong and those that regularly trip you up, how you work best, the kind of people who drive you over the rails, the things that powerfully motivate you . . . whatever you’re aware of that will help your coach’s input approach the target.
• Expect a clear plan for some combination of meetings, telephone conferences, assessments or inventories (if called for), and checkpoints. defined outcomes and expected timing. Rates and payment schedule should be part of this agreement. I recommend working on a month-by-month basis (for ongoing work) or a per-project contract (for well-defined initiatives like “develop an improved performance feedback system for me to use with my team”.
• Come prepared. When you’re working with me, this is unlikely to mean “come with your homework done.” I avoid tactics that make the client dependent on the coach. But it does mean coming prepared to engage in the reflection and consideration that will make a coaching session valuable to you.

  So set aside this time. Mute your other phone. Switch off your computer monitor. If there’s a huge project hanging over your head, jot down the items you’re afraid you might forget and take a minute to quiet your mind and remind yourself that a short investment in increasing your capacity for effectiveness will pay off in the successful completion of the project.

Nothing is more compelling than an argument with which the person already agrees.

So when you want to win over someone who has a face set like flint, it’s time to inquire rather than proselytize. What does he need? What kind of information does he find convincing? What are the concerns that he has? What is the worst outcome he can foresee? What does he believe to be true that he thinks you’re overlooking? What would it cost him to agree with you?

Chances are you’ll find opportunities to easily fine-tune your case to meet his objections. You may learn new information you need to take into account. He will have had an opportunity to look at the situation from a wider perspective. And, as the two of you co-create a common solution, he is likely to find himself persuaded.

1. Write yourself an e-mail.
   Rather than digging up a post-it note and then hoping you don’t lose it later, if you’re at your computer, just send yourself a quick message with the subject line “Ideas - business concepts” or whatever. Many e-mail programs can be set up to recognize and immediately file it for future reference.
2. Carry a moleskine
   This is a nifty high-quality notebook that is worth the money. It is small enough to carry everywhere, with crisp paper, a ribbon placeholder and an elastic band to keep it closed. I’m particularly fond of the small square-grid variety because it makes organizing small snippets so much easier.
3. Use Jott
   Pick up your cell phone, dictate a message, and have it turn up in e-mail several seconds later. It doesn’t get much better than that. See further discussion on theTips and Tools pages.
4. Tell your spouse
   What if you wake up in the middle of the night without your moleskine? Well, depending on how good your idea is, you might roll over, nudge your spouse awake and tell him or her all about it. Yes, they will be irritated. So irritated that they will likely remember what you say in great detail, hoping to get you back for it in the future. (This method is not recommended by In Your Corner Coaching & Consulting. Use at your own risk.)

If you don’t have passion and purpose, greater productivity won’t help you.
Anonymous

The wise know what to be thinking about, where as the merely intelligent only know how to think.
Scott Berkun

Bad news does not get better with age.
Michael Hyatt